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4.30.2009

i have a confession to make...


My daughter is a bully. There. I said it.


She hits, pinches, pulls hair, and generally stares down kids that come into her path. We've tried timeouts, and have been known to leave playdates early when it gets really bad. But she's still "THAT" girl. You know the one. You can't turn your back for a second at the library because she'll conk your kid in the head for no reason. Or push your kid down on the playground. Or pinch a "friend." I feel like I need to get one of these for her.My friends assure me that this is "normal" for her age and that it doesn't reflect on our parenting. But how can it not? I'm sure people think we beat her at home...where else would she learn these behaviors? I swear that we don't. We're just as baffled as the average passerby.



I know that she likes to test me, and often hits when she knows that I'm looking. I understand that she's trying to get a response out of me, and well, it works. But I feel like we give her so much positive praise and attention. Why does she seek negative attention too? As a teacher, I worry that this will carry over into the school years and she'll be a kid who is annoying and has no friends. AAAAAHHH!!! I know that I'm getting ahead of myself, but that's how my mind works.

I wish everyone could see the beautiful, funny, kind girl that we see at home when there are no other kids around. The girl who {sometimes} shares her snacks with Mama, the girl who sings songs with me, the girl who curls up in my lap to read books, the girl who gives unsolicited hugs and giggles from that place deep within her belly. THAT girl is the real Emerson. But where does she go when there are other kids around?
Fortunately, I have good friends who still invite us around, even when my child has tried to strangle theirs. For that, I'm eternally grateful. But any advice on the issue would be greatly appreciated.

2 comments:

Bauerfamilyof5 said...

Owen was the worst. He used to bite and was mean. I didn't do much except to keep repeating, "The Bauer's don't hit...the Bauer's don't bite, etc." They're so young at that age. He outgrew it and turned into the nicest sweetest 3 year old (and 4 and 5, etc.). There is hope. Hang in there!

Diana said...

We knows she is good at heart! Love that little Emerson!

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