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2.18.2009

the side effects

DISCLAIMER: I LOVE being a mom. I love it so much that I quit my "regular" job to stay home and do this full time. Emerson is my heart and I don't know how I was ever happy before I met her.

That's the disclaimer part. Now, on with the rest of my my thought.

I've gleaned, over the past 18 months, that there are some side effects of parenthood that no one tells you about. For those of you who don't have kids, take heed. None of these are worth avoiding children altogether, but you should just be forewarned:

** I had no idea that I'd be in bed by 10:30 every nite. My little angel has recently taken to a regular pre-5:30am wake up, so this is absolutely necessary in order to function without being a screaming ogre.

**No one told me that even when Emerson is not present, I would be incapable of eating a meal in more than 4 minutes. I've gotten so used to scarfing with one hand while feeding her with the other that I speed eat even when I don't have to.

**I was not aware that shopping would go from a fun outing to a dreaded chore. When your companion has the attention span of belly button lint, it's not so fun to try on new shoes.

**During Emerson's waking hours, I do not ever watch grown-up TV. Our esteemed Governor was arrested, tarred, feathered, and impeached without my seeing any of it. I think there's an election coming up, right? I wonder who the new President will be?

**It so happens that former pampering errands like manicures and haircuts have gone from relaxing "me" time to another thing that needs to be coordinated around naptime and babysitter's schedules.

**I had no idea that I'd spend the equivalent of a college education on photos. That darn kid is so stinkin' cute that I can't stop taking her picture. I think I need an intervention.

I'm sure there are other things, but because I'm multitasking while Herself sleeps, you don't have my full attention. Feel free to add your own to this little list.

:)

2 comments:

Bauerfamilyof5 said...

Yep, that about sums it up. Just wait until you add more kiddos...sometimes I wonder why we do it. And, then I catch a glimpse of them out of the side of my eye....and I remember. So, so worth it.

Jeni said...

I would add that talking about bodily functions becomes quite natural. So much so that I need to remember that most people don't want to hear about how many times a day my children poop, pee or spit up.

I would also add that you learn a whole other language which you also need to remember not to use in public. I am constantly reminding myself to say real words and not Mason speak.

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