random musings

Alright, I fully admit that I'm listening to Thriller as I type this thanks to About80s.com radio on iTunes. The song scared the BEJAYSUS out of me as a child, due in large part to Vincent Price's eerie cackling at the end, but it's oddly comforting on this Friday. Of course, I had the album in 1983, when I was all of 6 years old. I remember unwrapping it on Christmas morning, the strange juxtaposition of Michael and that tiger staring me in the face. I remember instantly wanting a pet tiger. Never got around to that.
One reporter on CNN last nite lamented "Did you honestly think we'd watch Michael get old? Can you imagine seeing him @ 80?" Well, no, but it's still a shock. I hope he finally finds some peace.

Ok, enough about that.

I've had some things on my mind all week, and aren't you lucky that you get to be on the receiving end?

A. If I thought 146 degrees with 300% humidity sounded like fun, I'd live in Mississippi. Or the Amazon. The heat has been unrelenting, and I'm ready for a cold front.

B. I'm not a fan of sunblock. There. I said it.

I hate slathering it all over my wiggle-worm of a toddler. I hate the greasy feeling on my hands. I hate that the spray sunblock leaves blotchy parts of burn on whitey skin (AKA Jeff) where the spray doesn't hit. I hate that I smell like it all day. It used to smell good, like a pina colada, but now that it's sunBLOCK as opposed to sunTAN LOTION, those good time smells are a distant memory.
Now, before you go calling DCFS on me, of course I put it on Emerson. I'm not willing to play roulette with her health to appease my petty grievances. But getting it on myself is more of a challenge. I am blessed with olive skin (thanks, Mom!), rarely burn, get a great tan, and am admittedly lazy about wearing it. But I'm trying to be better.

C. While we're on the topic of thinking that I'm a horrible mom, I have to get this off my chest...sometimes I get bored playing with Em. I know that someday in the not-so-distant-future, I'll miss having a girl who wants to spend time with me. I try to remind myself of that, I really do. But sometimes, I just don't want to build a tower. Or play house with her Little People. Or draw on the driveway with chalk. Sometimes, I'd rather curl up with a book (sans pictures, if you know what I mean) or surf the web or waste time on Facebook or just do nothing at all.

Sigh.

I know, I'm a horrible person for even thinking it. Sometimes I honestly think I'm too selfish to be a Mama. I know other people feel these things, but only the selfish ones actually say them out loud (or in print, as the case may be.)

D. So, if you've been reading the blog for a while, you know that I'm a runner (hee hee, I still have a hard time saying that with a straight face, even after 2 1/2 marathons...) Right now, I have no upcoming races on the schedule. I'm just running for me, with no specific training plan or goal in mind. For me, this is harder than training for a distance run...it's REAL easy to fall off the wagon and start skipping runs. But 2 things have happened this week that are keeping me on the road:
1. someone told me that my body is "athletic." In a list of 100 adjectives describing my physical self, that's about the 84th one that I would use. So this was pretty cool for me. Ok, you got me...it was my husband, but HONEST, in the 12 years I've known him, he's NEVER said this about my body.
2. This morning, I dropped down to a new "decade" on the scale...one I last saw on my way UP in college, oh, 12 years ago! I know it was due to sweating my arse off in the heat this week, but I'll take it!

E. I don't like the fantasy genre of books, movies, or television. I think it's the practical side of me, but I feel like it's a waste of time. I checked a book out of the library this week, thinking that it would be realistic fiction, and was so irked when it took a fantastic twist. I finished it, and it was a cute story, but UGH...keep it real, people!

Ok, I think that's all that has been on my mind of late. Thanks for rambling along with me!

Make it a great weekend~
a.